For the past year or so we've received phone calls from an elderly lady somewhere in northern Alabama. The first few times it happened I cheerfully chirped to her that she'd dialed the wrong number, but thank you very much and please have a nice day. For some reason I'm notoriously polite even though I am actually a cranky old bitch. I'm an enigma, people! Anyway, on with the story: As time went on, every time I saw the number on the caller ID and was met with the oh-so familiar "Hi baby, what're ya doin'?" my patience grew shorter.
Last week when she called I'd just about had it. "Ma'am, you've dialed the wrong number again. Would you mind double-checking, please? This seems to happen a lot. Thanks!" That's what I sound like when I'm angry, so let that be a warning to any of you clowns out there who are jonesing to tick me off. I'm malicious!
Tonight she called again. I guess after a year and a half even my fuse reaches its end, so I unloaded on the old broad.
"Ma'am, I do not know you, I have never known you, and every time you call me I tell you that you've called the wrong person. This has happened once a week for the past year. What is it going to take to get you to look at the numbers when you dial them?"
"Oh, no. I beg you to forgive me. [She actually said that! Way to make me feel like a tool, granny.] I'm trying to call my granddaughter, but I'm blind and the phone has all the numbers programmed into it. They keep telling me they've changed it, but I guess they haven't. I'll ask them to re-program the phone again. I'm blind, and it's hard sometimes. Goodbye, sweetie."
God. I am such a douche.
Last week when she called I'd just about had it. "Ma'am, you've dialed the wrong number again. Would you mind double-checking, please? This seems to happen a lot. Thanks!" That's what I sound like when I'm angry, so let that be a warning to any of you clowns out there who are jonesing to tick me off. I'm malicious!
Tonight she called again. I guess after a year and a half even my fuse reaches its end, so I unloaded on the old broad.
"Ma'am, I do not know you, I have never known you, and every time you call me I tell you that you've called the wrong person. This has happened once a week for the past year. What is it going to take to get you to look at the numbers when you dial them?"
"Oh, no. I beg you to forgive me. [She actually said that! Way to make me feel like a tool, granny.] I'm trying to call my granddaughter, but I'm blind and the phone has all the numbers programmed into it. They keep telling me they've changed it, but I guess they haven't. I'll ask them to re-program the phone again. I'm blind, and it's hard sometimes. Goodbye, sweetie."
God. I am such a douche.
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